A matter of life and death
Henry Marsh has saved thousands of lives – but still has deep regrets
- Caroline Frost
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One of the most respected neurosurgeons in the world, a pioneer of awake craniotomy techniques on semi-conscious patients, Henry Marsh has saved thousands of lives in his 40-year career – so why, in his retirement, does he think about one little girl almost every day?
In his working life, Marsh frequently visited hospitals in Ukraine to perform operations, and in 1992 he opted to remove a huge but benign tumour from the brain of nine-year-old Tania. The first operation went well, the second proved far more complicated, and the child had a stroke, spent six months in hospital and died the following year. Marsh says sadly now, “I should probably have judged it to be inoperable. I bit off more than I could chew.”
Retired for ten years, Marsh is the author of three books and now the subject of a documentary in which he explores the weight and reward of his career, acknowledges the cost it had on his family life, and meets the relatives of his patients – both those grateful for his work, and those who blamed him when things went wrong. He is heard quoting French surgeon René Leriche, who wrote, “Every surgeon carries within himself a small cemetery… a place of bitterness and regret,” and, for the British surgeon, the regrets are both professional and personal.
Early in his career, he admits he wasn’t open to doubting his medical prowess, and neither did the hospital culture encourage it. “You end up believing too much in yourself,” he says. “I can think of various serious mistakes I made, where if I’d asked another colleague’s opinion, they would have seen something I couldn’t, because
I was too emotionally involved. Sometimes I made decisions too quickly, I was doing too much work and working too hard.”
Every surgeon carries within himself a small cemetery
Henry Marsh
He talks of the toll his workload took on his family, admitting he never put them first. Despite this, he’s just back from a holiday with his children, grandchildren, ex-wife and present wife of 26 years (historian Kate Fox) – all of which sounds like things have improved on that front? He laughs gratefully: “It seems to have worked out OK.”
However, retirement has seen Marsh face a fresh challenge, namely his diagnosis in 2021 of advanced prostate cancer. Becoming a patient on the other side of the consulting room has shaken him to the core. “I was disappointed by the fact I got very upset,” he says. “Rationally, I say I’m 75 years old, I’ve had a pretty good life. I’ve been dealing with people dying all my life, and I ask myself, ‘Why are you getting so upset about it?’ But I’m just another human being.”
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In lectures around the world, he always tells students and trainees, “Know your limitations. Ask for help.” Now as a patient himself, in remission but with frequent scans and appointments in all-too-familiar hospital surroundings, he adds, “One very important part of good doctoring is to give people hope, to break bad news, but somehow put a positive spin on it. Part of that positive spin is to say, ‘I care for you, I will look after you.’ You can’t operate if you get too involved with patients. But at the same time, you mustn’t lose your humanity.”
Authors
Caroline Frost
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